Pretty Close to Where I Live

Pretty close to where I live, in this field of gay-coloured posies, I spotted a young man who I calculated to be an appropriate type of victim for my molestative advances. Previously, I had been actively -- VERY actively -- involved in the Internet-sort of pedophilic activites. That day, however, a more thorough consideration of circumstances revealed that Catholicism offers far more opportunites for boy-hole fucking than does the digital standard of yore.

I love you. Obey the collar, bitches.